Canned!

Hey everyone! In case you haven’t noticed, I haven’t been around in a while. No Hump Day Surprises – nothing! Why? Well, life has been interesting.

The reasons for my hiatus are wide and varied. To start with, there was all kinds of day job interference. Then there was planning for vacation, vacation, and… something else. What was it? Let's see … oh yeah! I was canned from my day job last week. Yep, fired. Shown the door. Tossed out on my – ahem.

Being canned has been a mixed blessing. Like most writers with a day job, I've always dreamed of having an extended period of time to work on my book. I can't tell you how many times I’ve sat at work, wishing I was at home working on my book instead of whatever it was I was doing. When I was canned, one of the first thoughts that went through my head was, ‘Fine! At least I'll be able to go write!’

So that's exactly what I've been doing.

I've always had the notion that if I ever had a solid block of writing time I would really crank things out but this is the first such opportunity I've been given.  The results have been astonishing. In the past two weeks I have completed somewhere between two to three months worth of work on my WIP. It's truly amazing.

Kicking ass on my WIP isn't the only nice thing about being unemployed. The weather here in Minnesota is absolutely fantastic right now. I’ve been eating my lunch out on the deck, opening the windows to hear the birds sing and – gasp – I’ve actually had the time to read something other than comic books! It has been blissful. The only thing that could make it better would be if I could walk over to the money tree and pull off a 10 spot to pay for the martini I’m was thinking about making later this afternoon.

You see where this is going, right?

The other experience that unemployment has given me is an appreciation for my day job. Don't get me wrong, I would be more than happy to sit home all day and write, do the grocery shopping, the cooking, the cleaning, you name it, but that particular job pays for shit. Even if, say, nine months to a year down the road I actually get published, it’s extremely likely that job would still pay for shit. And in the meantime? My not working would mean no comics, books, or music, not to mention what it would do to the budget for everything else.

So, like it or not, I'll be going back to work as soon as I can find a job. It will be hard to go back to snatching an hour here and there to work on my WIP, but that’s just the way it will have to be. And, in a way, I’m ok with that, because life wouldn't be any fun without comics, or books, or music, or nights out on the town with my lovely wife.

Wiscon and Philosophy

Two weeks from now, I will be in Madison for Wiscon, the Feminist Science Fiction Conference. Going to readings and getting writing tips from the pros. Selling my freaky woolen creatures (hopefully). Staying with my best friend, which means learning new hooping tricks and playing (losing) endless geeky girl strategy games. Yup: my own version of heaven. And it's within driving distance.

One of the things I'm excited for this year is the free writing workshop Wiscon offers. I'll be getting my first 10,000 words critiqued by a small group of fellow as-of-yet-unpublished writers and an author. I've done this once before, two years ago. Here's where I was in the writing process at that time: I'd taken a Loft Children/Young Adult writing class; had a complete draft, with at least one full revision done; I'd gotten positive responses from my fellow classmates and instructor; my mom loved my story (cue flashing red warning lights.) I was ready to send my baby out to the world of agents. She was so cute, who wouldn't snap her up for a nice cuddle?

I sent out four queries.

All rejected within a couple days.

And then I went to Wiscon, and discovered the novel was not, in fact, ready for mass consumption. My pacing was off and, lo and behold, I wasn't writing for Young Adults like I'd thought. I was writing for Middle Graders. I got lots of great advise from the other writers, and the professional. And I've taken that advice and run with it. Plus, I've also taken another Loft class since then, this one focusing on Science Fiction, and I've improved the novel through two sets of revisions with my fancy schmancy super duper writing group. I know it's better. Much, much better.

So, I've been feeling the urge to start looking up agents again. But, this time, I'm going to wait until after Wiscon to send off any queries. Hopefully, I'll get feedback that assures me that it's just about time. And if not, well, I'll most certainly like the novel even more once I'm done working through whatever suggestions I'm given.

One last tidbit, to tie in with my last post. In the previous Wiscon writing workshop, the pro (again, who gave me tremendously useful advice overall) wondered if I needed the philosophy. Couldn't I tell the story without three teenaged pseudo-reincarnations of Plato, Thomas Hobbes, and Simone de Beauvoir? Maybe I can. But at this point, I still think the story is richer with the philosophical elements. I'm curious about any Wiscon feedback I'll get on this point.

Stay tuned.

This Sucks

"Don't say stinks, darling. If absolutely necessary, smells. But only if absolutely necessary." - Margaret Lord, The Philadelphia Story

Have you noticed how, on the Interwebbies, if you’re not fond of a film or book or song that someone else loves, you are a “moron,” and if someone else hates something you love, that thing “sucks?” (I’m using the most polite versions of the terms one stumbles across). What ever happened to celebrating variances in taste? What ever happened to the art of the thoughtful critique?

When we’re younger, sure, things we like are universally “amazing” and things we don’t like “blow.” Not only that, but when I was younger, I was mocked mercilessly for enjoying anything that was too popular (with the exception of those certain cultural tent poles that everyone MUST love, like Star Wars or Monty Python), or too cheesy, without being ironically so. I therefore kept my bourgeois opinions to myself, and instead touted the brilliance of your Akira Kurosawas and David Foster Wallaces. Also, I didn’t dare say I was bored, turned off or unimpressed with anything that had reached culty cool status, like the movie Blue Velvet or the graphic novel Watchmen.

What set me free: The band U2. I don’t like the band U2. There’s something about the repetitive thrum of guitar in the background and Bono’s wailing voice that sets my teeth on edge. Nearly every person (okay: male person) of my generation likes-to-WORSHIPS U2. In my early 20s, whenever I would tentatively state that I disliked the band, I was more often than not told I was an idiot, that I didn’t understand, that I was wrong. Like most people in their early 20’s I took this hard, until I had an epiphany: I started telling people that I fully understand that, yes, U2 is a band for the ages, but, well, gosh, I just don’t like them personally, and then I would proceed to explain why I felt this way. You know: I strove for a little more eloquence than "your band blows." This tact confused young U2philes, angered them, and then eventually shut them up. Also, it’s completely honest. There are bands out there that are truly terrible, and U2 is not one of them.

Likewise, in my old age wisdom, I proudly (and in some cases, sheepishly), proclaim my right to take pleasure in things that are geeky, cheesy, flawed, or, heaven forefend, insanely popular. I enjoy me some John Denver. I adore the movie Joe Vs. the Volcano. The Harry Potter series ranks amongst my favorite things in the universe. Whew. There. That was liberating. Liking these things doesn't make me stupid or tacky or a Philistine (okay, maybe a little with the John Denver); I simply now allow myself to enjoy some stuff that the little intellectual hipster voices in my head have heretofore pooh-poohed.

Fill up my senses like a night in the forest, baby.

That’s not to say I don’t think there’s a place in the world, or on the Internet, for criticism. As much as we writers often hate or fear it, it’s an essential part of art. Without a critical observer, what is art? It’s a whole tree/forest thing, to be sure. I welcome critique, of my opinions, and yes, even my own creations. Without my writing group, the Scribblerati, my novel wouldn’t be coming along nearly as well as it is. Thank you, gentle critic friends.

It’s the personal attack aspect that gets me down, and the black-and-whiteness of it all. I read the first Twilight book, and I pretty much detested it, but I know plenty of intelligent, well-adjusted women who find the series to be a terrific fantasy escape. They don’t “suck” for liking the books, but folks on the Intertubes might tell them as much.

So, maybe this “you suck for liking, or for not liking that” attitude floating around out there is due to the fact that most people leaving comments on the Internet are young, or perhaps it’s worse than that, perhaps anonymity is the death of graciousness. Whichever: It just makes me appreciate the rare insightful, fleshed out and civil critique all the more.

You Are What You Read

The old saying “you are what you eat” has some meaning for me as a writer, but I believe it’s more like, “you are what you read.”

Here is a list of my top 10 writing inspirations, the authors I admire and am thankful for, that I read and hope that in the end that some of their awesomeness has rubbed off on me and my writing.

Ten Authors That Inspire Me and My Writing

10. Neil Gaiman. I started reading his work with the SANDMAN graphic novels (OK, the art drew me in too), but I’ve enjoyed his screenplays, novels and short stories, too. What I like most about his writing is his ability to blend the real world and the supernatural into his works. He also looks good in black.

http://journal.neilgaiman.com/

Advice from Neil: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpNb5NwxX_g&feature=related

9. Harlan Ellison. Any of you remember that show on the SciFi channel (not the hideous SyFy channel of today) called SciFi Buzz? I loved the segments Harlan did on that show. I also love his dark short stories mostly because they drip with attitude and secondly because the man can turn a phrase. Recommendation: “REPENT HARLEQUIN!” SAID THE TICKTOCKMAN.

Harlan's impressive credentials: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0255196/

8. Kurt Vonnegut. I had the pleasure of hearing Kurt talk at my alma mater years ago. I still remember some of the things he said. Almost everything that came out of his mouth was quotable—and isn’t that something a good writer should be? Here is one statement he made that night that cracked the audience up, “If you really want to hurt your parents and don’t want to be gay, go into the arts.” My fav book by him: SLAUGHTERHOUSE FIVE.

7. John Steakley. His books ARMOR and VAMPIRE$ (the latter made into a mediocre movie by John Carpenter) have a fabulous sense of adventure and bigger than life characters (and also some fun dialogue) which is why he’s here on my list.

6. Michael Crichton. In his autobiography “TRAVELS” he talked about how early in his life he wanted to become a doctor, write books and direct movies—and sure enough that’s what he did, in about that order. Any author with an iota of the drive of Mr. Crichton had would go far. My fav book by him: EATERS OF THE DEAD (made into a movie I have to watch anytime it’s on TV, THE 13^th WARRIOR.) And of course, where would we be without JURASSIC PARK ?

5. Christopher Moore. What can I say? Any author that can make people laugh is doing his/her job right. http://www.chrismoore.com/

4. Cormac McCarthy. A writer so good he can get away with anything. When I bought THE ROAD I couldn’t put it down, reading it after work on two consecutive nights. The thing I think I admire the most about this story and this author is that the details are so sparse, yet the story is so compelling. Cormac doesn’t even bother naming his characters (the Boy and the Man), he doesn’t get specific on the location or the year or exactly what happened to the world—and most of the book he seems to shun most common punctuation that gives this book an almost dream like quality.

3. Dean Koontz. Oh to master pacing and character like Mr. Koontz, or to be as prolific (I was aware of about 50 of his books, but it sounds like he may have written over 70). My fav of his works: WATCHERS (best dog character ever) http://www.deankoontz.com/

On creating ODD THOMAS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDupVfc7Rv4&feature=related

2. Stephen King. I’ve written about Mr. King on this blog before, and last Halloween I walked past his house in Bangor, Maine. To say I’m a big fan is an understatement. The reasons why? Again, to be so prolific (and sell so many books) would be an honor. He claims to write every day (something I aspire to but manage only 50% of the time). But I think it is his mastery of giving me characters I like and care about so much is what most inspires me about this writer. Upon completion of two of his books (at least), THE STAND and IT, I found myself a bit bummed out—because I wanted to know what was going to happen to those characters next—and the book was over.

http://www.stephenking.com/index.html

Advice to writers from King:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hqp7A0B7abc&feature=related

1. Ray Bradbury is at the top of my inspiring authors list. His books of short stories like THE OCTOBER COUNTRY and THE GOLDEN APPLES OF THE SUN were some of my first forays into science fiction and horror—and the imagination and poetry of his work has made a lasting impression on me. A few years ago I had the great pleasure to see him at an opening for something he believed in—a new library in St. Cloud, MN. After his reading that day I was literally the last person in line to see him and he stuck around, announcing an hour into the signing portion of his appearance (much to my relief) to all the waiting fans that he’d stay as long as it took to chat with everyone there to see him. When it was finally my turn in line he shook my hand and joked with me. I gave him a fan letter, thanking him for all his inspiration he’d given me over the years, me the novice writer. Six months later I was shocked to find a message on my answering machine from no other than Ray, wishing me a happy Easter and thanking me for the letter. A few days later an autographed copy of his book ZEN IN THE ART OF WRITING arrived in the mail to me from him. All authors should be so gracious and generous to their readership let alone be so talented.

Ray's thoughts on books, writing and life:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzD0YtbViCs&feature=related

Thanks for reading!

Mark

If it works, it works

I’ve been writing all my life. At the start, my cousin and I filled yellow legal pad after yellow legal pad with a rambling Dungeons and Dragons type Sword and Sorcery story; it went on and on and on. I hesitate to call it a novel, at this point, since it had no real over-arching plot, but hey… at least we were dedicated to it.

What I’m saying is: Writing has always been something that I do. It’s been natural and flowing and carefree, but ever since the four or so years ago when I decided to get serious about my favorite pastime and try to turn it into a career, the idea of a “suggested” word count length has hung over my head like a guillotine ready to drop. In fact, if I had to choose, the “suggested” word count would be the one thing I really worry about.

Everywhere you turn, the numbers shake out about the same:

90,000 to 100,000ish for a first time novel.

120,000 to 130,000ish, maybe, if it’s a genre book.

And what was my final draft before this last batch of edits?

177,823

Huge.

But here’s the problem: I’m just telling the story. Sure, I have since gone back and cut extra words and a few scenes that never really did what they were supposed and a few moments that repeat themselves, yadda, yadda, yadda, but still, even being generous, in the end, let’s guess that I’ll end up cutting about 25,000 words, give or take. That’s a ton, true, but once all of the dust and the hoop-la settles?

Final word count: 152,823

That’s still in the stratosphere as far as the commonly held belief goes. But what options do I have? I consider myself very open to suggestions, critiques, and edits, at least… I try to be. My end goal here is to put out the best product I can, and I recognize that you need outside eyes to accomplish this, but I’ll be honest with you…

After this initial 25,000 is gone, I do not believe there will be a significant number of words left to still cut out. And another 20,000? No way. Not without cutting the story too deep and sacrificing in a “bad” way, in my opinion. At that point, I think I’d be risking the book’s soul, doing more harm than good. It’s a fine line, I know, between being cautious and being obstinate, but really, I’m honestly trying to walk on the side of angels here and I don’t see how it can be done.

In fact, I’d go so far as to say that it can’t be done. Can Not.

Ballsy? Yes, but that’s me, baby.

Anyway, I’m paranoid enough about this, this goddamn word count thing (and don’t people say it so snooty to? Like it’s fucking gospel? “Oh, it has to be 100,000 words or no one will even look at it, blah, blah-blah…” Ass.) …anyway, I’m so conscious of it that it is consistently the one thing I do not do, despite the fact that the majority of agents request that the word count be included in queries, but fuck that. No way am I just showing my ass like that.

Why would I?

Agents and publishers are very busy, they’re swamped with requests from people who look, walk, talk, and act just like me, and they will straight out admit that the first round of cuts is based off of arbitrary first impressions and what is more arbitrary that the “preferred word count”? So yeah, no way am I going to just hand them a free “Denied” card like that. If they ask, I’ll tell them, but otherwise… Mum’s the word.

Besides, like all how to get published “rules” go, there’s a big old BUT attached at the end and that is, in a nutshell: “If it works, it works.”

And that gives me hope.

Case in point: Joe Abercrombie.

Joe writes fantasy books, dark, bloody and brutal, they are epic tales of well drawn “real” characters in a fantastic world of magic and murder and massive armies. 100% good time. Loved ‘em. I devoured them. And here’s the kicker:

The Blade Itself? 190,000 words.
Before They Are Hanged? 195,000 words.
The Last Argument of Kings? 230,000.
Best Served Cold? 225,000.

Now sure, the later books will usually give an author more leeway word count-wise because they have established themselves, but still… Look at that! First book, 190,000 words, but it reads like a house on fire! Blistering, baby.

But how did that happen? How did that monster manuscript land on someone’s desk (and probably break it due to the weight) and then actually get read despite its size? Short answer? I don’t know. Right day, right time, right person, luck and magic (shrug). The point is, it did get read and it got published.

So here’s hoping…

The Philosopher's Stone

Take a look. Take a good look. Especially if you're reading this from somewhere in the U.S.

Yup. You see it now, don't you. Someone's been mucking about with the title. Everyone knows the first installment of the Harry Potter heptology is called Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. What's this Philosopher's Stone business?

Well, I'll tell you. This cover is a British cover--sporting J.K. Rowling's original title. Yup, you heard it here. The ORIGINAL title. (Okay, who am I kidding? You probably know this already, right?) Rowling's title was changed at the request of the U.S. publisher.

Well, excuse me. (Yeah, really, just give me a sec so I can climb up on my high, high horse...)

Alright then: So, if you've been following my posts, you know that I'm a philosopher. And so I have issues with the switch from a philosopher's stone to a sorcerer's stone. I get that some words don't translate well from British to American English. Pretty sure I would have been confused if I'd read that Harry et. al. ate potato jackets for dinner, followed by a dessert of quivering mountains of lime jelly, one peak of which unfortunately toppled and messed up their scarlet and gold wooly jumpers. So, yes, translate away. But, whereas British 'jelly' means American 'Jell-0', we are not dealing with a mere issue of clarifying meaning here. When the Brit's say 'philosopher', they're not referring to what we North Americans are referring to when we say 'sorcerer'.

In case you aren't aware, the Philosophers' Stone is a reference to the as-of-yet-unfinished philosophical/alchemaic project for discovering how to change base metals into gold. (We're just on the brink of a major breakthrough. I swear.) Also: an Elixir of Life, and producer of Immortality. In other words, something Voldemort *shudder* would love to get his scary, claw-like hands on.

The sorcerer's stone? Never heard of it.

So, why did the U.S. publisher want to change the title? Apparently they thought kids wouldn't be interested in a book with the word "philosopher" in the title. So, what we have here is a snub (remember I'm sitting on a very high horse right now. But I'm getting off it. Right...

...now.) It used to be that after I first started teaching and people asked what I did for work, I'd tell them I was a professor. I'd dread the question I knew was coming next. "Neat," they'd say, all bright-eyed and interested, "and what do you teach?" There'd be a pause, while I clenched and unclenched my jaw. Eventually I'd have to tell them. Invariably, their eyes would lose all their glorious, shiny sparkliness and they would say, "Oh." We'd stare at each other for a minute. They'd realize that their drink needed refilling and they'd wander away. Or they'd say, "I took a philosophy class in college." And then go on to tell me about how it was either their worst class EVER, the worst prof they'd EVER had or the worst grade they'd EVER gotten.

If that were the end of the story, then, yeah, it wouldn't make much sense to put the word philosophy on the cover of a book you wanted to have any parent buy (unless that parent was a philosopher--and you'd be reaching out to pretty small market there.)

But something's changed. Now when I tell people what I do, they smile. They want to know more. They want to know what books I would recommend, who my favorite philosopher is. They tell me they majored in philosophy. Oh my, people seem to really like philosophy.

I'm hoping so anyway. Coz' it works best when you write what you know. And one thing I know something about is philosophy. So philosophy filters through my writing. I've got characters who are inspired by real philosophers. I've got ideas and conflicts that are inspired by philosophers. And I'm hoping that kids and their parents will be open to the word 'philosophy' and come to love my characters, conflicts and ideas as much as I do.

Although, at this stage, I'm mostly just hoping that an agent and then eventually a publisher will be open to the word. But more on that in my next post.

Right now I've got to get back to the philosophy lab. I'm quite confident that next time I'll be posting as the new and improved, *sparkle* Immortal *sparkle* Lisa. No wait, the new and improved, immortal Lisa who has her pockets jam packed with pretty, pretty gold nuggets.

Pretty sure you'll want to be my friend then, huh?

A few thoughts about self-publishing

I just I just linked to this stunning article from the Wyrdsmiths site: Serious disruption just over the near horizon.

There's all sorts of juicy bits in there but there are a few of Mike Shatzkin’s comments I would like to focus on:

“If by the end of 2012, 25% of sales for a new book are digital, then about half of new book sales will be made through online purchases if we count the print book sales made through online retailers (mostly Amazon.)

Online print sales can be served through inventory generated on demand. So, if these estimates are right, we are less than three years away from a publisher (or author) being able to reach half the market for a book without inventory risk!”

Mr. Shatzkin’s article goes through and enumerates several ways that this is a tectonic shift in the publishing industry but there's one that really stood out in my mind:

“Self-publishing strategies for entities that can do the marketing become much more compelling. It is no secret that an author can make more money on each copy sold managing her own publication through Lulu or Author Solutions or Bookmasters. If half the market is directly available without regard to the effectiveness of a field sales force then we can be sure, at the very least, new title acquisition will be more challenging for established publishers.”

Now, I have been keeping a relatively close watch on the recent developments in the publishing industry and the primary reason is because I have always been intensely curious about the possibility of being able to self publish my book someday.

It has been clear to me for several years now that the day would come when self-publishing would be a viable option but I have always felt that self-publishing wouldn't be feasible until two critical pieces were in place:
1)    e-book adoption reached a “critical mass” 
2)    There was a mechanism by which authors could reach their audience

I think #1 is well on its way to reality.

As for #2, one of the biggest advantages to going with a traditional publisher has always been “books on the shelf.”  How else would one get found?  Yes, it has been possible for several years now to sell an e-book through various websites, but just putting your book out on the Internet is no guarantee to sales. In fact, I would say that strategy is a guarantee for almost no sales. Having a book in the New Release section of brick and mortar store means your book is in competition with maybe 50 other books. But putting it on the Internet and letting it sit? That's the proverbial needle in a haystack.

So let's revisit my second quote. “Self-publishing strategies for entities that can do the marketing become much more compelling.” The key word in there is marketing, or as I stated earlier, reaching your audience.  IMHO, that is one of the few barriers left to those are interested in self-publishing. Worried about editing? Hire a freelance editor. Worried about having physical copies of your book? Use one of the print on demand houses like Lulu. Worried about not having an agent? I may be going out on a limb here, but I would guess that as the number of good authors who choose to self-publish increases, so will the number of agents willing to work with them.

In the end, however, it all comes back to marketing. You have to be able to reach your audience.

I'll save my thoughts on that topic for my next post. In the meantime, what are your thoughts? Am I half crazy? Completely over the edge into Looney Land? Let me know!